Archives for category: 7 Habits

Image result for zig ziglar quotes you can have everything

In November 2017, I was allowed to participate in a wonderful and unique networking experience called “Women Making Waves.” This occurred on a cruise ship departing from Galveston, TX that brought together some brilliant female speakers and entrepreneurs who theoretically needed some body-guard types to protect them during this adventure (at least that was the story that I was telling myself as I attempted to justify why I was a participant in this adventure).

I was blessed in meeting many new acquaintances, including Angel Tuccy, who introduced me to a powerful phrase that she used…”givers gain.”  It resonated with me, and took me back to one of my mentors, fellow Dallasite Zig Ziglar, who professed that “if you will just help other people get what they want,”  you may ultimately benefit as they will tend to help you with achieving the things that you want.

This aligns with Stephen Covey’s “emotional bank account deposits” theory from his seminal book, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. Covey professed that if you helped people out when they were in need, either reactively or proactively, then eventually, if you ever needed something in return from them, the likelihood of them reciprocating would be greatly enhanced.

Most importantly, neither one of these brilliant role-models meant for these theories to be used or manipulated in a self aggrandizing manner. Rather, they approached these philosophies from the unselfish perspective that …”givers gain.”

 

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In his seminal work,  The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, Dr. Stephen Covey introduced his philosophy on empathic communication…Seek first to understand, then to be understood.

Dr. Covey notes that there are five types of listening: Ignoring, Pretending, Selective, Attentive and Empathic.

Exceptional communicators strive to achieve that pinnacle stage of becoming an empathic listener, i.e. “putting yourself in the other person’s proverbial shoes”. This means paying attention to the level that we truly understand their feelings and emotions.

The physical act of hearing is different that the mental act of listening. Listening with empathy requires a concerted effort to commit your undivided attention to the speaker. Sounds easy, does hard!

Fortunately, we can develop the skills to become better listeners, and communicators.

One technique that has helped me improve in this area is to conscientiously “listen with my eyes.” By maintaining comfortable and consistent eye contact with the speaker, it helps me to focus on them and to better concentrate on the message they are trying to deliver.

listen eyes